Tunnel Snakes Log: May 18, 2017

“SQWAAAAAAAK swOOK SQAK…. Just kidding…

So, the adventure continues on the road to Murk, nothing out of the ordinary until we find a bunch of stones with number markings on them. After some snooping around them we notice one is missing from the lot (and no, there were no rocks up anywhere to fall on us for the last time). We determine that there isn’t much else to take of the situation so we continue on the path. BUT WAIT!

We find some goddamn tribal lookin’ stick weildin’ KNOLLS! That’s right… Large grassy hil….wait.. Wrong thing. GNOLLS! GNOLLS WERE EVERYWHERE (ohshiiit). Looks like two tribes lookin’ at each other sideways, some dead and one almost dead with a bag. We needed that bag.  Luckily I had a plan, the BEST plan, and a TREMENDOUS plan. After all I do have the BEST people… So I climb up this tree and with a jump and a “SQWOOK” I flew the fuck down there, reached for the bag and…OW. OW OW OW OW. Lots of stabbing, I didn’t like that. I needed help and fast. Luckily I have the BEST people, they really are great… So anyways, I jump out of the way with my superior jumpy skills and Torth totally spikes those motherfuckers to the ground!

The rest of the gang starts trying to pick off who they can reach little by little, using the cliff on our left to our advantage for one poor fellow. As I am making my way back I notice the missing rock from earlier, COOL, I also notice that some Gnolls are trying to push it on Simone(ohshiiiiitSecutuswasriiighhtt), NOT COOL. So I warn Han and Simone with some amazing hand waving feat and Han swiftly gets out of harm’s way, Simone fuckin’ backflipped off the fucking thing like a rogue(but not as cool as me), WAY COOL. Fighting continues and we continue kicking ass while getting a healing rubdown from the dwarf, and we notice the Gnoll with the bag tossed it to another freed Gnoll!

Double time here, we kill more gnolls previously trapped in our spikes and capture the two running away with the bag! Stabbing continues until we have our hands on this prized bag, contents unknown. We fought so hard for this, shed blood, tears and beard hair, what if it’s gold? What if it’s the crown of a king? Probably could get a hefty prize if it was someone’s valuable lost artifact from time past. As we gaze at the bag we think of the meaning of life, death, slugs, and the upstairs neighbor who loves playing their clarinet at all hours…

Toodleooodle ooooooooo toodleoodle OOOOOOOOOO!

It seems to never stop, but then again, it’s kind of nice in this odd way. Art ART is happening. It makes you feel good about the world, even when you are bleeding from stab wounds from these stupid… GNOLLS! The bag! How long was I just totally lost in this beautiful stitchwork. I wonder who made the bag? Maybe a seasoned seamstress from a wealthy town overlooking a glen, that sure sounds nice right about now. Oh, yes! The bag’s contents! We open it up ever so slooowly, as to not wake up any sleeping ants on that log. There are really quite a lot of ants here, I hope they don’t bite. Ack, they are all over my boots. Oh shit, it’s just a doll… That sucks….I guess just give it to the cat lady…..

Off to Murk…”

A Murky Mystery – March 16, 2017

The party gains two new members, Simone, a Felis ranger hailing from the south, and Secutus, a human paladins from the kingdom of Finnick. A dark cloud hangs over Secutus.

An interrogation of Friar Skilera gives the party little information. His responses stink of falsehoods, half truths, and lies. He claims there is a large bounty of 300gp for his captures at the mining village of Murk, but how much of that is true is yet to be seen; it could simply be a ploy to save his skin.

The rest of Skilera’s men scattering into the surrounding country side, the party secures Skilera with ropes and gags, and prepares to continue their way to Murk when a most strange interruption occurs. They are contacted by an ancient ghoul seeking their assistance in capturing others of his kind.

The ghoul’s name is Ezra, and he is what is called harbringer for a society of undead known as the Endless. Unlike many of their kind, the Endless believe undeath is a blessing not a curse, and seek to remain a part of human society. Harbringers seek out those that have recently ‘reawakened’ to determine their suitability as new acolytes of the Endless.

Ezra and his acolyte assistant Liosa have enlisted the aid a seeress, a blind mortal woman named Astraea. She has directed them to a location where 6 new ghouls will be crossing through to reach the undead city of Malazan. Ghouls that make their way to a necropolis such as Malazan are rarely seen again, either used as slave labor or twisted and corrupted to serve as soldiers. Ezra seeks to capture them all before they are lost forever.

The ambush spot is a small farm which lies south of Whispering Creek, a tributary of the Lije river which flows through the valley of the Free Farms. Beyond the creek to the north lies the ruins of Arnoth tower, a stronghold for undead forces and the boundary of Malazan’s influence. Ghouls managing to reach this spot will be captured by Malazan forces..

Ezra and Liosa will make a distraction at Arnoth to keep the creatures their occupied while the party is to try to capture ghouls as they make their way north. Captured ghouls are to be brought to a group of standing stones known as the Heroes. The ground of the Heroes is sanctified and Malazan forces will have no power there. Astraea will await there.

To assist in the ghouls capture, Ezra has provided the party with four enchanted collars that can subdue undead and make them receptive to orders. These old artifacts are from bygone days when certain cultures exploited the undead phenomena to create a cheap labor force.

As a reward for their service, Ezra has promised the party 90gp for every ghoul captured. If they manage to capture at least three ghouls, he will also include a lesser wishstone of the mind. If the party is able to capture at least five ghouls, he will send word to the chapter of Endless at Wardengate to provide training to the party in tools or languages of their choice.

The party will receive 75xp per ghoul captured, and will gain an extra 100xp if four ghouls are captures and another 100xp if all six ghouls are captured.

The party reached their destination as the sun started to fall behind the mountains to the west, casting a dark shadow over the land. Ezra’s parting words were to stay alert and keep watching for hidden danger; Malazan has many hidden agents in the region. Also, though he and Liosa would do their best to keep the undead tied up at Arnoth, some may break through. The party should keep their eyes on the north for unexpected danger.

Ezra and Liosa then left the party to their own devices. Just then, Maghahn cried out. He keen eyes had alerted her that something was approaching from the south. A large mob of farmers carrying torches were making their way north, their angry howls carrying on the wind.

It appears the ghouls are being pursued. Time is short and the party must race to take their positions to capture their prey before they escape north or are brought down by the mobs that are on their heels.

A Murky Mystery – session #5

Game played: Friday, July 15

After the bull encounter, Mags lockpicks the submerged chest and gets it open. Inside, they discover a number of objects:

• 3 wizard scrolls: Identify, Detect Magic, Comprehend Languages
• 40 Sefta Azarite Beads (a currency for a tribe to the far south)
• 100 Taureg Fruit Seeds (a currency for a desert tribe)
• Vindr coins: 30 SP and 200 CP (split up between all of us: 6 SP 40 CP for each person)
• 400 Kuai, a Cantonese paper currency
• 3 small Baatari masks: fox, moon moth, [a third one I didn’t catch] (from a far eastern people)
• Crushed glass flowers (some are partially in tact)
• Traditional Hun attire
• Vindr noble attire
• A piece of some stone circular object made of sandstone (the one that looks like a quarter of a BMW logo)
• 3 amber necklaces: strange eye, icky black liquid with a magical aura, large amber piece with a petrified fairy inside

Murr casts identify on the amber necklace with the black goo inside and determines it has no magical qualities but is able to discover that it’s the blood of an old, other worldly creature.

The group tucks away the treasures between all of them and continue on their journey. After a trek of about a quarter mile, they approach the final bridge before the mines. It’s large (about 300′) and snakes across the river. It looks as if it’s a newer construction built over an older bridge.

Mags scouts the area from a distance and sees an archer hiding in a large tree near the beginning of the bridge. She gets within the range to shoot a her with her bow and succeeds. The archer is hit! She scrambles off the tree and tries to escape but Mags shoots again, this time ripping her head off her body. LETHAL!!! Her body falls into the river and floats away.

The rest of the crew get closer to the coast and hide among some large rocks. Hannya perches atop one of the rocks and can see 2 men on a mini-island ahead, staring at the pool of blood from their fellow archer, aghast. She lets the party know what she sees.

Murrdyn casts magic missle and takes out one of those guys. The second guy starts to take off but not before Hannya catches up to him wading in the water and takes him out!

At this point, more bandits are visible on the mini-islands dotting the river, and the party carefully but violently proceeds to injure and kill most of them. Even a crocodile joins the fun and ends up chomping on a fleshy piece of Hannya, but she is still kicking!

Up ahead on the bridge appears a man dressed differently than the others. Before waiting around to see exactly who he is, the Tunnel Snakes slaughter him. (later determined to be Okeb, an elemental monk.)

The Tunnel Snakes take out more bandits on the bridge and neighboring mini-islands, and finally get to the end where they see Friar Skrillex flanked by some guys blocking the bridge passage.

Hannya gets within melee range and takes a few shots at the Friar but the blades just woosh through his ghostly image. An appiration! No one can seem to hit him.

Murrdyn meanwhile attacks the guys blocking the bridge passage and ends up killing 2. The third one runs away, and out from under the bridge, scared as shit as the body count increases, is the REAL Friar Skrillex. He scurries into some rocks nearby and climbs into a boat but before he can reach for the oars — THUMP! — in jumps a giant woman with horns, with a crazed look in her eye. Hannya grins, looking at the terrified little man with the funny haircut, and kills him.

200xp for the party members.

230 for the log writer (me!)

Written by Karina.

A Murky Mystery – session #4

Game played: Saturday, July 9, 2016

Last session, we left the Tunnel Snakes at Meir Farms up against some bizarre plant and vine creatures. Hannya and Mags quickly dispatch the well creature and rush over to help the others with the numerous creatures attacking Torthen, Murrdyn, and Eugene, but get there just as they kill them off. Hannya and Mags go check to see if there was anyone in the well but unfortunately only find the dead body of a male, probably the father of the family.

When doing a more thorough search of the buildings on the property, Hannya discovers the toolshed was being used as a workshop to carve a bunch of figurines. Xabier recognizes them as mountain troll figurines, carved and usually placed out in various parts of the farm in order to appease the mountain trolls living in the area. Does this have anything to do with the water issues facing the Free Farms?!?! Hmmm….

The Tunnel Snakes continue deeper into the farm, hoping to find the rest of the Meir family, dead or alive. Murrdyn sees a flash of pink behind some plants and slowly comes up to see a dirty little girl, in obvious distress. He kindly beckons her out, discovering the little girl’s name is Annie Meir. The group, not wanting to scare her with the news of her parents’ demise, decide to return to Grooty with Annie.

As the Tunnel Snakes arrive at Grooty’s, Annie scurries up to her, calling her “grandma.” The group quietly lets Grooty know that Annie’s parents were killed during an attack. She thanks them for finding Annie and offers the crew dinner and housing for the night before continuing on.

The next morning, the Tunnel Snakes come upon a caravan of 6 halflings: a leader, three traders, one wounded bard, and an armed fighter with a crossbow and lance riding a giant weasel. They had been attacked by some bandits. Torthen shows the group goodwill and heals the bard in their group, which rewards him a 1d6 Inspiration Ability Hit (that’s how I wrote it in my notes. I have no idea if that’s right, haha.)

The halflings let the Tunnel Snakes know that they were travelling with a fortune teller named “Roland Nickles” when they were attacked. Afterwards, they noticed he disappeared along with some of their goods, so they’re not happy with him. The group makes mental note of his name in case they run into him later.

The halflings are also selling amber necklaces. Some of the party members buy one, including Hannya who buys one with a butterfly; Torthen who buys one with a spoopy scorpion; and Murrdyn who buys one with a flower.

They part ways with the caravan and come up on a river with a broken bridge and a partially submerged caravan in the water.

Mags decide to hang back and hide in the high area among the grass, looking for anything suspicious while Hannya swims towards the caravan. Torthen, Murrdyn, and Xabier stay on shore, with Murr using his owl to scout the river.

Hannya locates a chest inside the submerged caravan that is chained to the cart. She attempts to break it open but it won’t budge so she bobs back up above water and lets her crew know. At that moment, Xabier notices movement in the water and alerts Hannya. She climbs on to a broken post, out of the water, and Torthen, who had started swimming towards Hannya, says “fuck that shit” and heads back to shore.

Turns out the movement in the water were crocodiles! Murrdyn immediately casts an apparition in the water. Two crocs appear, one headed for the apparition and the other for Hannya. As that battle starts, Mags sees a weird sight among the grass: A naked man is skulking a few hundred feet behind them, traveling towards the group. As he gets closer, Mags sees an amazing sight: The man transforms into a bull with flaming horns and begins to close in on the group.

Meanwhile the crocodile circling Hannya attacks and injures her, but doesn’t get a second chance as she takes her shortsword and finishes the croc off, pinning his corpse to the post.

The second crocodile finds a different fate as Torthen casts a successful charm spell on him and becomes friendly for whatever the duration of that spell is.

Mags comes out from the grass and alerts the group of the approaching bull, but the bull makes himself very known. He begins to run back and forth hysterically, lighting the surrounding grass on fire. Xabier steps forward and mind projects the bull with a vision of the Tunnel Snakes rescuing it a few days ago. The bull becomes calm, almost nods as a thank you, and runs away.

Short rest ensues!

• 100xp for all
• Xabier reaches level 2

Written by Karina.

A Murky Mystery – session #3

Experience earned: 50xp

Game played: Saturday, July 2, 2016

The Tunnel Snakes go searching for the stolen goods from the caravan but find nothing but scraps. Even the stolen horses were killed to be used for food. The group agrees that the thieves must be pretty desperate and starving to do such a thing, and decide to stop searching for them.

As they continue heading towards the Free Farms, they come across barn by the riverside. Dead bodies of various livestock  are found along the river. The group cautiously approaches the barn which is shut from the outside. Mags peers in and sees that there is a dead man and a live bull inside.

The group decides to release the bull and let it free instead of killing it and successfully do so. Once inside, the crew finds a ring on the dead man that reads, “To Tiern, my true love.”

The Tunnel Snakes continue on their path but realize they are running low on water. They come up on another homestead with an old lady sitting on her porch. She is named Obara but goes by “Grooty.”

Her farm seems different than the other farms the group had been walking through. She has a garden with growing plants. The group assumes she has water so they ask her for some. But she asks for a favor in return for the water.

She says she hasn’t heard from her friends at Meir Farm in days, which is odd, and asks the Tunnel Snakes to check up on them and find out if anything fishy has happened. The Snakes agree and make their way to Meir Farm, still thirsty.

Meir Farm is oddly quiet. Murrdyn goes to the door and knocks but there is no response. Mags and Hannya peer into the house through different windows and see nothing out of the ordinary. It’s almost as if the family just disappeared.

Murrdyn and Flintok go over to some weird viney bushes growing to the north of the farmhouse and find a gruesome discovery: there is a body in the center of it.

Meanwhile, Mags and Hannya go over to a well that has weird vines spilling over the side. Hannya calls into the well, not expecting a response. But she gets one.

A faint voice replies, “Help me. I’m hungry. Save me.”

Not all is well at Meir Farms. Not at all. The Tunnel Snakes prepare for a fight!

Written by Karina

A Murky Mystery – Interlude#1

He wasn’t like the others. He knew it. His owners knew it. The other’s like him knew it. The land knew it.

As he grew, his friends grew to respect him; his owners grew to fear him. They gave him a silly name: Big Rex, but he chose a different name: El Fuego; The Fire.

One day the river changed and the water turned salty. The land started to die. His owners were desperate and left. He did not care.

Using his powers he cleansed the waters near his home, allowing his friends to drink and the grass to grow. For a brief time life was peaceful and good.

Then a man learned of his secret and trapped him in a building. The man asked for power and water, but he would not help the man. He would not have an owner again. He killed the man. But now he could not escape.

For days he tried break his way out.

Then a miracle happened. The doors to his prison opened on their own. He was free. But his friends were dead from the tainted water. Filled with grief he went to drink death himself and join them.

But no; some force had set him loose. A reason! Revenge! He would bring destruction to the men. Anger filled his eyes and filled his soul. He began his journey to where he knew the men now lived.

A Murky Mystery – session #2

Experience earned: 50xp

Friday, July 1, 2016 session

The Tunnel Snakes get summoned to Reginald Foster’s estate to talk about a job. A carriage takes the team to his estate outside of Munghold. It’s very fancy with a large mansion and a vineyard, and is under construction.

Alstair, Reginald’s butler, meets us at the entrance and leads us to Reginald who is looking over paperwork at a large table, prepared to serve the team a meal. He asks the Tunnel Snakes for help with a friend of his down south named Norman Till. His girlfriend has gone missing in the salt mines. Reginald offers us 500 silver to help Norman, and the team takes the job.

The next morning, they join a caravan of 3 carts run by 4 hill dwarves: Captain Jorhail Fovorlug and his 3 captains / wives. On the trip, a well-to-do son and father join the caravan to travel with the group for safety purposes. They rub the group the wrong way so they split up once the road begins to head south toward the Free Farms, but before that, they let the group know that there is an inn to look out for once they arrive the Free Farms area.

When they finally arrive there, they see that there are no lights coming from the inn. Murrdyn sends his owl familiar to check out the building and discover that it has been burnt to the ground. The Tunnel Snakes explore the ruins and find lots of skeletons in the ruins. Murr and Mags find a key and chest. Murrdyn uses his Mage Hand to open the chest, which had an explosion waiting for whomever opened it. But since no one was in its range, it fizzled out and revealed a bag with money, a scroll, some dice, and cooking gloves.

We join back with the caravan who had made camp down the hill near a stream, eat dinner, and prepare to turn in for the night when 4 scraggly figures appear to the south, walking towards the caravan. The Tunnel Snakes prepare for action and ready their weapons in case they turn out to be hostile but instead, once in range, they identify themselves as four brothers searching for their missing sisters. The group agrees to help them look for the sisters right as screams are heard across the river and over a hill. Everyone heads in that direction, leaving the caravan and the hill dwarves behind.

Once they clear the hill, they come across two men attacking the two sisters, but the closer the group gets to the attack, it suddenly stops: the group had been led into a trap. Not a second too soon, Murrdyn casts a sleep spell, incapacitating a few of them. Mags shoots an arrow and hits one of the sisters in the hand, pegging it to a tree behind her. The remaining brothers beg for mercy and spill the beans over their intentions.

They were simply luring them away from the caravan so they could steal the goods and return them to a “Friar Skilera”, who was in charge of the whole operation. The men doing these thefts were all former farmers, hungry and starving, only doing this to survive. Iarl, one of the brothers, claims that the Free Farms are gone and this is all they had to make ends meet.

The Tunnel Snakes let them go and return to the caravan, seeing a very large group of people doing exactly what the brothers had described: stealing the one cart full of goods and leading it off into the darkness. They meet back up with the dwarves and prepare to look for this “Friar Skilera” the next day. They make camp for the night.

Written by Karina “Hannya” Young, hungry monk.

Feats

Weapon Mastery Feats

Fell Handed

You master the handaxe, battleaxe, greataxe, warhammer, and maul. You gain the following benefits when using any of them:

• You gain a +1 bonus to attack rolls you make with the weapon.
• Whenever you have advantage on a melee attack roll you make with the weapon and hit, you can knock the target prone if the lower of the two d20 rolls would also hit the target.
• Whenever you have disadvantage on a melee attack roll you make with the weapon, the target takes bludgeoning damage equal to your Strength modifier (minimum of 0) if the attack misses but the higher of the two d20 rolls would have hit.
• If you use the Help action to aid an ally’s melee attack while you’re wielding the weapon, you knock the target’s shield aside momentarily. In addition to the ally gaining advantage on the attack roll, the ally gains a +2 bonus to the roll if the target is using a shield.

Blade Mastery

You master the shortsword, longsword, scimitar, rapier, and greatsword. You gain the following benefits when using any of them:

• You gain a +1 bonus to attack rolls you make with the weapon.
• On your turn, you can use your reaction to assume a parrying stance, provided you have the weapon in hand. Doing so grants you a +1 bonus to your AC until the start of your next turn or until you’re not holding the weapon.
• When you make an opportunity attack with the weapon, you have advantage on the attack roll.

Flail Mastery

The flail is a tricky weapon to use, but you have spent countless hours mastering it. You gain the following benefits.

• You gain a +1 bonus to attack rolls you make with a flail.
• As a bonus action on your turn, you can prepare yourself to extend your flail to sweep over targets’ shields. Until the end of this turn, your attack rolls with a flail gain a +2 bonus against any target using a shield.
• When you hit with an opportunity attack using a flail, the target must succeed on a Strength saving throw (DC 8 + your proficiency bonus + your Strength modifier) or be knocked prone.

Spear Mastery

Though the spear is a simple weapon to learn, it rewards you for the time you have taken to master it. You gain the following benefits.

• You gain a +1 bonus to attack rolls you make with a spear.
• When you use a spear, its damage die changes from a d6 to a d8, and from a d8 to a d10 when wielded with two hands. (This benefit has no effect if another feature has already improved the weapon’s die.)
• You can set your spear to receive a charge. As a bonus action, choose a creature you can see that is at least 20 feet away from you. If that creatures moves within your spear’s reach on its next turn, you can make a melee attack against it with your spear as a reaction. If the attack hits, the target takes an extra 1d8 piercing damage, or an extra 1d10 piercing damage if you wield the spear with two hands. You can’t use this ability if the creature used the Disengage action before moving.
• As a bonus action on your turn, you can increase your reach with a spear by 5 feet for the rest of your turn.

Tool Feats

Alchemist

You have studied the secrets of alchemy and are an expert in its practice, gaining the following benefits:

• Increase your Intelligence score by 1, to a maximum of 20.
• You gain proficiency with alchemist’s supplies. If you are already proficient with them, you add double your proficiency bonus to checks you make with them.
• As an action, you can identify one potion within 5 feet of you, as if you had tasted it. You must see the liquid for this benefit to work.
• Over the course of any short rest, you can temporarily improve the potency of one potion of healing of any rarity. To use this benefit, you must have alchemist’s supplies with you, and the potion must be within reach. If the potion is drunk no more than 1 hour after the short rest ends, the creature drinking the potion can forgo the potion’s die roll and regains the maximum number of hit points that the potion can restore.

Burglar

You pride yourself on your quickness and your close study of certain clandestine activities. You gain the following benefits:

• Increase your Dexterity score by 1, to a maximum of 20.
• You gain proficiency with thieves’ tools. If you are already proficient with them, you add double your proficiency bonus to checks you make with them.

Gourmand

You have mastered a variety of special recipes, allowing you to prepare exotic dishes with useful effects. You gain the following benefits:

• Increase your Constitution score by 1, to a maximum of 20.
• You gain proficiency with cook’s utensils. If you are already proficient with them, you add double your proficiency bonus to checks you make with them.
• As an action, you can inspect a drink or plate of food within 5 feet of you and determine whether it is poisoned, provided that you can see and smell it.
• During a long rest, you can prepare and serve a meal that helps you and your allies recover from the rigors of adventuring, provided you have suitable food, cook’s utensils, and other supplies on hand. The meal serves up to six people, and each person who eats it regains two additional Hit Dice at the end of the long rest. In addition, those who partake of the meal have advantage on Constitution saving throws against disease for the next 24 hours.

Master of Disguise

You have honed your ability to shape your personality and to read the personalities of others. You gain the following benefits:

• Increase your Charisma score by 1, to a maximum of 20.
• You gain proficiency with the disguise kit. If you are already proficient with it, you add double your proficiency bonus to checks you make with it.
• If you spend 1 hour observing a creature, you can then spend 8 hours crafting a disguise you can quickly don to mimic that creature. Making the disguise requires a disguise kit. You must make checks as normal to disguise yourself, but you can assume the disguise as an action.

 

New Fighting Styles

Close Quarters Shooter

You are trained in making ranged attacks at close quarters. When making a ranged attack while you are within 5 feet of a hostile creature, you do not have disadvantage on the attack roll. Your ranged attacks ignore half cover and three-quarters cover against targets within 30 feet of you. Finally, you have a +1 bonus to attack rolls on ranged attacks.

Tunnel Fighter

You excel at defending narrow passages, doorways, and other tight spaces. As a bonus action, you can enter a defensive stance that lasts until the start of your next turn. While in your defensive stance, you can make opportunity attacks without using your reaction, and you can use your reaction to make a melee attack against a creature that moves more than 5 feet while within your reach.

Mariner

As long as you are not wearing heavy armor or using a shield, you have a swimming speed and a climbing speed equal to your normal speed, and you gain a +1 bonus to AC.

A Mucky Mystery – session #1

Experience earned: 100xp

The first day of summer (Fri. June 17, 2016 session)

Much had changed in the past year, Hannya noted as she walked through town. She reached the Hungry Hero and it seemed that changed too. Now under new ownership, surly, The Sick Dog was packed to the brim with patrons, who’s faces she’d never seen. Quietly she ordered an ale and sat at the only vacant table to await her companions, who should be arriving in short order.

Wait….Did that man just fucking spit in my GODDAMNED ALE? I’ll PUNCH EM IN THE GABBA I SWEAR ON ME MUM!

*Fisticuffs ensue*

She finds herself surrounded by men, all sweaty and drunk….THE BACK DOOR! She makes a quick run for it and they chase after her. Locked. Fuck….

Wait… I hear Torthen through the door!

We both try to open it, to no avail. She needs to fight, this is clear as day now. Torthen, after beating some gnarly dudes outside fuckin’ flips through the window #420noscope like and yells “EZ, SCRUBLORDS”. They proceed to kick the shit out of people and a chill dude totally decides to help. All of a sudden Meghan slips through the back window and bitches are on FIRE!

Alright, NOW WE’RE COOKIN!

We totally kick everyones asses and they run for the hills…HAH!

Well look who the no-eyed buffalo dragged in… Murrdyn and his….Friend? Buddy? Guy? Pal? Find out he’s a pretty chill dude as well who’s name is Xabier.

Laughs are had and then we all decide to interrogate the ass who spat in my ale. Fuck that guy. Anyways.

Find out we had a bounty on our heads and they were hired by the slumlord  Timon Gottfreid which means we’ll need to pay him a visit soon. We also needed to visit Reginald Foster, but decided some payback was a little more important.

We reach the house, if you could call it that, but it looked almost torn to pieces. Murrdyn make the wise choice to send in his spider companion and use his eyes to look around. There he was. House torn to shit inside and out around him and a knife in his belly. We make haste upstairs and try to fish any information out of him that we could, but all we got was hateful words. He did mumble something incoherent though….when Meghan decided enough was enough and dug the knife in deeper to finish the job.

Written up by Jen, master storyteller